Music

Music is my best friend, my best accompaniment. Music is always there irregardless when i'm moody, i'm down, or i'm happy. In short, music is my life.

I've started learning piano at da age of 4 and after much delays and hardships, i finally gotten my grade 6 certificate during my pre-secondary years. Its quite amusing dat although i've learnt piano for almost 10 years, during dat period, i somehow didn't develop an interest in music. Wat kept me goin on was da thinking dat it would all be wasted after coming so far n quitting it half way. After my grade 6 cert, i noe dat it was impossible for a person who do not have interest in music and has bad finger control to actually continue dis road and I chose 2 stop learning. Surprised enough, it was only after quitting piano dat i start to fell in love with music. Maybe b4 dat i was 2 obsess with daily chores like homework, tuitions, lessons and all like any other kid in my area.

As i grow up, i've faced many obstacles. However, it was my piano dat went through da thick n thin all da time. It made me start 2 think dat not quitting in da 1st place was definitely da rite choice. When in da absence of my piano since i'm, studying away from home, i listen 2 music.
Whether if i'm down, i'm studying, i'm bored, i'm furious, i'm in love, i'm missing love, i'm travelling or so, music n i are inseparable. It certainly helped me went through my breakup when i needed it da most. Since i've gotten my new phone, ppl use to criticize my habit of listening to da headphone 24/7 but little do they noe bout my love for music.

My love for music developed to da extent dat i've even tried to compose songs which got me a chance to have it presented in a concert. Some say my composing sucks, some say dat its a good start, but little do they noe bout da story hidden beneath dis song and its origins. However, it was good experience working with pianist, guitarists, drummer and singers which small amount of ppl get the chance to experience. Anyway, i stopped composing due 2 lack of time but definitely haven't gave up on it.

Now, i have onli 2 dreams on music. 1, to compose a song good enough for an album's ost and 2, to own my own grand piano. Sounds impossible but my dream is 2 make it possible.


- Another post after my 2nd sleepless nite -

I too can be an emo bastard sometimes

Howcome i'm still getting sleepless nites after da FYP craze, i wonder.
Howcome every now n den i still have dreams of wat happened more than half a year ago.
Howcome I'm not da me dat i used 2 be b4.
Howcome 1 + 1 does not equal to 2 in life.
Howcome things dat i like differ from others.
Howcome it wasn't as easy on me.
Howcome i'll stare blankly without a reason n wander away.
Howcome wat i give is not wat i get.

I miss da sunset on bear bear hill.
I miss da dips in da pool in a hot day.
I miss da hugs n kisses every now n den.
I miss da foolish things we did back den.

I fear da looks of others.
I fear da sense of uncertainty.
I fear being placed in small spaces.
I fear failures.

2 much 2 do b4 graduation.
2 much 2 miss after graduation
2 much 2 care in da near distant future
2 much 2 look forward 2 in da new world

2 little time b4 graduation
2 little done during these 4 yrs
2 little achievements to self satisfaction
2 little cares have been given out to da world

I might be an engineer, i might not
I might see u again, i might not
I might earn a fortune, i might not
I might be a better man, i might not

Wateva happens,
I wish u all da best
I wish for da better future
I wish dat these memories stay foreva
I wish there is a connecting line between us all

- nicholas -

Yep, 1 question was changed so dat they can't sue me for copyright.

1.Do you believe in love at first sight?

Not anymore.

2. If you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you? Why?

Kenny sia and Dawn Yang. 1 for da humour n da other for da beauty.

3.Where is the place that you want to go the most?

Japan

4. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?

Of course to have more dreams come true.

5. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?

Its science dude. Of course i've seen 1, in fact every now n then.

6. What are you afraid to lose the most now?

My conscience.

7. If you win $1 million, what would you do?

Double it in investment, coz if I dun, it'll run out pretty soon.

8. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?

Depends, but if I do, I'll make sure she feels da same for a win-win situation.

9.List 3 things you'd say to the person who hurt u most.

Dun say sorry, dun say I dunno, and dun lie again.

10. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?

To play different roles at different times.

11. What annoy you the most??

Emo bastards.

12. Which do you prefer from your other half? hug? or kiss?

Err... can i have both?

13. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?

Point out 2 me, but dat ain't a social norm, at least from where I come from.

14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?

My skills.

15. Will you hate the person who hurts you most?

Its a thin line between hate n luv, because both co-exist.

16. What kind of electronic device/gadget you own that you like most?

k810i

17. If you have a chance. Which part of your character you would like to change?

Probably my optimism, coz it has failed me over n over again.

18. What makes you feel disappointed?

When I'm, lied 2.

19. If given a chance, do you want to see your future?

Nah, watch "Paycheck for further info.

20.What does your friends labelled you as?

2 many 2 mention, but most of them aren't for da good.

Nicholas Seyz

Nicholas seyz : Let it go. If it returns, its urs for a long long time.
Speculations : Nah. Da good guys onli win in hero action movies.

Nicholas seyz : I like freedom n i give freedom.
Speculations : Da more freedom u give, da more "free" they get.

Nicholas seyz : Its not everything, its just something.
Speculations : Guys tell me I'm wrong. Gals tell me i'm rite.

Nicholas seyz : I am not a good actor, I dun act.
Speculations : U dun have drama everyday, but without drama, life is dull.

Nicholas seyz : Money is not an issue in love.
Speculations : I beg ur pardon? Think again.

Nicholas seyz : Trust is da utmost important factor.
Speculations : Wait till u get "I dunno" for a reason.

Nicholas seyz : I do my best for everything in my control n I leave da rest 2 da fella up there.
Speculations : Sometimes u wished u could have done more than wat u've already had done.

Nicholas seyz : Dun worry, its gonna be ok.
Speculations : I onli hoped it'll be ok, I neva noe if its gonna be.

Nicholas seyz : I'm ok, dun worry.
Speculations : I neva was.

Nicholas seyz : Good nite, sweet dreams.
Speculations : I've neva had 1 in a long long time.

2 Gatsu 14 Ka

I used 2 play da keyboard while u sat beside me.

I used 2 hug u tightly.

I used 2 tell u stories of my life.

I used 2 tell my friends proudly dat u r my gf.

I used 2 put our photographs as my wallpaper.

I used 2 chat with u till late nite.

I used 2 stare straight in ur beautiful eyes.

I used 2 say u were smart.

I used 2 say, my gal plays CS betta than me.

I used 2 be loved.

U used 2 say sleeping is a waste of time.

U used 2 ask me if I loved u.

U used 2 pester me 2 buy soft drinks for u.

U used 2 hold my hand n never let go.

U used 2 call me bao bei in my ear.

U used 2 say u wanted 2 watch me play basketball but never had da chance.

U wanted many things but I couldn’t give u.

U used 2 cry in my arms while I’m helplessly looking.

U used 2 tell me everything bout u n everything u did.

U used 2 tell me excitedly when u’ve gotten good results.

Since when u started saying tq ?

Since when u stopped calling me ?

Since when u rather spend time with ur friends rather than me ?

Since when u started calling me nicholas ?

Since when I have 2 live in loneliness ?

Since when I have 2 eat alone ?

Since when I see a suitable gift but did not buy for my gal ?

Since when our conversations became shorter n shorter ?

Since when our arguments became a part of our lives ?

Since when it all started ?

2 Forget n Go on or 2 Pause n Look back?

Yep, 2day is da big day for my primary school classmate. Known her since standard 1, n shes getting married 2day. Usually kids from my area don't get married so soon, but her case is a bit different. Knowing her was like just yesterday where she was a kid of merely 1 metre tall with her pony tail running up n down da hallways of my primary school, constantly arguing with me bout things n 2day, shes getting married.

I was a blank piece of paper, like everyone else when i was born. However, living in a big city certainly left scars on me after being burnt countless times. I grew up in a competitive environment where survival is crucial, ego, selfish, materialistic, self-protective, emotionless, r all da things we learnt even as a child. I'll give u certain phrases constantly quoted by KL young adults. " Gals r everywhere, u dump 1 n u get 1, its da flow." " We KL ppl always stick 2 da rule of da thumb - We protect our butts" "Money is everything" " I dun run a charity. How much does being courteous pays u?" " Being a litterbug is good. If i dun throw rubbish everywhere, who is going 2 pay da road sweeper for their job?"
Wanna survive in KL, u've gotta learn these city traits.

Friends, i've got tones. True friends dat would put u b4 themselves, hardly any, even now. I guess its as hard 2 find as dinosaurs. Love? I doubt man. Come n tell me if u believe in true love after u've been burnt several times. In KL, Love = Money, so, get money b4 u get love. Ppl often say, : Y dis gal is so pretty n her bf is like shit? Well, next time plz look at his ride b4 making dat statement.

2 be able 2 hide ur thoughts is another essential skill in the law of survival, until now, i'm still not a master of it but i see many of my friends r beyond grandmaster level. 2 da extent dat when they r boasting, its da real stuff n when they r not, its da hoax, seldom u can guess their thoughts.


I have many gp of friends, going out everyday, partying on n off, outings once in a while, yum cha constantly, but somehow, some part in me, i still feel lonely and empty. Is been months, almost a year i've been having dis feeling, yet it does not get betta. Now i even pay more attention 2 it than usual, curiosity n cares comes from a distance. It'll be a long long time for dis 2 subside, i'm a slow healer.

2 forget n go on or 2 pause n look back?

Tanjobi no Omedetogozaimasu